I have developed a routine.
Every day, I make my rounds. I check the same sites: Mandy, Indeed, Staffmeup, Linkedin, specific locations I’d like to work in their employment sections. I do this once every day, and if I have nothing else going on, multiple times a day. Seeing as how I will soon be saying goodbye to my retail job, my search will probably become more stressful and even less fruitful.
I realize that my biggest struggle is driving distance. I’m a decent driver, but I’m terrible with directions, and my eyesight isn’t the best so I have difficulty ready street signs like most normal people do when they’re in a new location. I could use the GPS, but the GPS tends to stress me out. Although I’m a decent driver, the act of driving stresses me out enough as it is, and adding the GPS could be a bad idea. I have a lot of stories about using a GPS that I’ve witnessed firsthand.
Unfortunately, this seems to be the case with all of the job postings. The position is either in Chicago or very close to it. I’ve seen a couple of positions in Schaumburg that I was interested in, but when I attempted a drive out there, I couldn’t find a proper exit to get to the location. Now I’m too worried about the drive to work to think about those positions. It’s a tough process.
I’m still wondering what exactly it is that I want to do, and maybe this is another reason why I’m having such a difficult time. As more time passes by, I’m becoming less and less confident in my abilities. Lately I’ve been feeling as if all of the praise I’ve gotten for my work has simply been because it’s coming from people who know me. I’m starting to feel like I’m not good enough for these full time positions anyway. It’s a toxic thought process, and I’m aware of that, but it doesn’t stop me from feeling that way.
Hopefully, in the mean time, I can get some freelance jobs. I may have to pull a contact out of my box from the past and see if that works out in my favor. I’m lucky I don’t have payments for student loans to worry about or else I’d be up the creek without a paddle.