Looking Back on the 2010s

I’m a bit late to the punch here, but since we’ve moved on from the 2010s into the 2020s, it still feels appropriate to take a look back on that span of my life. It was the time when I started making moves forward in my career, after all.

TL;DR Summary

• 2010: Graduated High School. Life in a Day submission. Started community college.
• 2011: Life in a Day screens at Sundance. Switched majors. Diagnosed with MS.
• 2012: Night of the Living Dead adaptation. EDTV internship. Occupied. Juntos.
• 2013: Rouge. Graduated college. Became a youth instructor. Started at university.
• 2014: Co-created ScreenPlay at university. Operated a radio show.
• 2015: Lights. ms and me. Graduated university.
• 2016: Lights screened at Geneva Film Festival. 3:03.
• 2017: Got married. Finished writing my next film.
• 2018: Return to Sender. Became a program coordinator.
• 2019: Return to Sender selected in 8 film festivals, includes a win for Best Suspense Short and nominations for Best Supporting Actress and Outstanding Female Filmmaker.
• 2020: Return to Sender screening at the Women in Horror Film Festival and ______

Before 2010, most of my career moves were entirely in writing. I wrote a lot of things, but never had the means to really do anything with it. I’ve looked back on some of those pieces of writing. They’re obviously written by a teenager, far too many dated cultural references. They could use some work.

After I graduated high school that year, I set out with a couple cheap consumer cameras and attempted some internet challenges. The results weren’t great, but at least I was doing something. I jumped on the chance to record something random for Life in a Day that summer, and much to my surprise, my little something was selected to be in the film that debuted at Sundance in 2011. The moment isn’t a lot in retrospect, but it was just the emotional boost I needed to continue on this path when so many things were stacking up against me.

I didn’t get into the top universities I applied for. I couldn’t afford the fancy trade schools that would get me connections and hands on experience with pro film equipment. When faced with the prospect of going into debt at a 4-year university for a major I didn’t want or attending the community college that my AP high school classes had told me was a personal failure, I chose the personal failure. At least I could manage to afford that.

Honestly, choosing that path has been the best decision I could have possibly made. After one year of attending community college for a major in psychology, I discovered that they had a mass communication program, complete with film and TV classes. I promptly switched majors to that. I got the bulk of my experience from that community college. I edited and produced for public access television. I got fantastic experience through an internship there, under the supervision of a boss who made me prepared for anything.

I met my partner there. His technical skill helped bring so many of my writing ideas to life. From my first shorts, Occupied and Rouge, to more experimental work like Juntos and the huge learning experience that was Reborn, we helped each other. We were on each other’s team. I would end up marrying this person in 2017.

Around that same time, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, an unpredictable and progressive autoimmune disorder of the nervous system that disrupts the flow of information from my brain to the rest of my body. Getting diagnosed with that, at the age of 19 and right when I was starting to make steps toward the career I had always wanted, was incredibly upsetting. I thought I was going to have to give it all up.

I confided in my professor at the time, and he told me to keep going anyway. He told me that my voice was still needed, and there would always be a way for me to tell my stories somehow, even if I couldn’t walk or see or physically write on my own. That professor is still one of my biggest cheerleaders.

After graduating from community college with a degree in mass communication and transferring to a 4-year university for my bachelors, my creative output slowed a bit. I tried to focus my endeavors in different areas. I dabbled in a bit of journalism, a bit of graphic design, a bit of radio. This period is when I started writing reviews, and I’ve been attempting to get better at that ever since.

I couldn’t stay away from film and television for long though. I met another work partner at university, and the two of us created a web series called ScreenPlay. Starting out as a segment in the campus news program, ScreenPlay soon became a 15 minute weekly program of its own. The show focused on pop culture and featured reviews of film, television, music, and video games. I produced two seasons of it. The show continued for a few years after we graduated, but no new episodes have been made since 2018.

In my final year at university, I started working on two more short films. The first, Lights, was my senior capstone project. It took a ton of planning and faced quite a few pre-production issues, but I finished it with a very small crew. It’s still one of my biggest projects because of the effects involved and the total running time. It’s also been one of my best received films. Lights would go on to screen at the Geneva Film Festival in 2016 and at the Indie Horror Film Festival in 2019.

The other short I worked on in this same time was ms and me. This one was made in a very short amount of time because it was for a class. Where I had several months to work on Lights, ms and me was made in about a week. This was a personal film for me, my first foray into the realm of drama. As the title would suggest, it’s about my diagnosis and struggle with MS as I interpreted it at the time. The film itself was certainly a learning experience. As my first attempt at drama, I think it may have been a little too dramatic. Since I was still coming to terms with my illness, I was more dramatic about it though, so I guess that makes sense. It also made me realize that I probably shouldn’t edit my own films. It helps me to have an outside perspective. I grow too attached to my footage and can’t always make the necessary cuts.

After graduating from university, I stepped into producing short films for others. I produced a couple short films for Jason Rugg and one for Noah Bailey. Over time, I’ve come to learn that my niche of helpfulness in that sense is more in the realm of a line producer or an assistant director. I specialize in forming a schedule and keeping things running smoothly on that schedule, assisting in pre-production and on set.

In 2016, I stepped back in the director’s chair to create my short film 3:03. This one was based off of a nightmare that I had following an actual event at my apartment. It’s my first film that I didn’t edit myself. I find it to be a successful three minute chiller, but it’s received a lukewarm response overall.

With my perceived failure with ms and me and the lack of positive reception for 3:03, I started to feel like I was in a downward spiral. I started to fear that I had peaked with Lights. In retrospect, I know that was a ridiculous fear to have. How can you peak when you’ve barely even started? How could I think so lowly of myself that I’d think my peak would be after making one film that got into one local film festival outside of university?

I’ve always had a fear of actually being successful, so maybe that’s where it all generated from. I was seeing the start of something more, but my fear made me fixate on the possibility that the beginning was really the end. Maybe the constant uncertainty of living with MS gave me feelings of burn out. Having both a fear of failure and a fear of success is a difficult predicament to find yourself in. It’s still one of my biggest struggles against being productive with the time and energy that I have.

During this period of inactivity, I took on more work as an assistant instructor. I lost the ability to see for a while. I planned a small wedding and got married. I worked some freelance jobs with my partner at E Leal Productions. I produced another film for Jason Rugg. I worked on a script for an idea I’d had for several years.

In 2018, my time working as an assistant instructor paid off with a bit of a promotion. I became a program coordinator for the summer program I’d been a part of for years. This position better utilizes my skills as a producer in film. I’m actually managing operations and making sure a program runs smoothly. That wording sounds awfully familiar.

The bulk of that same year was spent on production for Return to Sender. This film was a big step for me because I paid more attention to set design and props. I held auditions to connect with actors outside of my current circle. I was trying to get an abstract concept to come across to viewers, so the edit took a while to complete. I held a screening for cast and crew and a couple other test screenings, which resulted in some minor changes to the edit of the film. This all accumulated in a festival debut in 2019.

Throughout the last year, Return to Sender was selected to screen at 8 different film festivals, from Pittsburgh and Chicago to England. It was nominated for both Outstanding Female Filmmaker at the Stormy Weather Horror Film Festival and Best Supporting Actress at the Chicago Horror Film Festival. The film won Best Suspense Short at the Stranger Days Independent Film Festival.

Going into 2020, Return to Sender will be screening at the Women in Horror Film Festival. I’m so excited to be starting the new decade out with this. I’m going to try to take that momentum and continue moving forward. I have a lot more to accomplish. I have many more stories to tell. I’m just getting started.

Writing Through Things

Recently, many people have been asking me to describe what my upcoming short film is about. As I struggled to find the words to describe it, I realized that, at its core, it’s a home invasion story. Once I realized this, I looked back on my previous short film 3:03. I realized that my past film was also a sort of home invasion story.

Suddenly everything clicked together for me.

A couple years ago, I had an experience. I was living in an apartment, and one day, while I was alone in said apartment, one of the maintenance workers just walked in. He didn’t knock. He used his own key. I had no advance warning. I was at my most vulnerable. I no longer live in that apartment, but for the rest of my time living there, I never felt safe.

While I was processing that immediate fear I was feeling, I wrote the script for 3:03. It was filmed in the apartment where the event occurred. The film was about a woman who woke up in the middle of the night to a disturbance in the hallway outside her door. It was heavily based on a nightmare that I had.

At the time, I took that at face value. I thought it was just based on a nightmare that I had. It’s only now, in retrospect, that I’m realizing that my scripts are reflecting the fears that I’m working through in my own life.

I guess it makes sense. Every film that I’ve written up to this point has been based off of real experiences I’ve had. From a creepy public restroom and streetlights turning off around me, to a sort of home invasion, it’s all been based on true events.

Maybe that’s why people say my films creep them out. Maybe it’s because the feelings are genuine. For me, it’s very real.

Of course, this got me thinking about the horror genre. I started thinking of all the recurring themes that come up in horror films. Good horror films reflect real life fears at their core, and this is why the genre has such a loyal fanbase. Watching a good horror film can allow the viewer to process fears in a safe setting. In that same way, horror films can be therapeutic for their creators as well.

I’m not sure exactly when I’ll be done with my phase of writing home invasion films. I’m not even sure yet what my next project will be. Since I don’t have anymore home invasion stories up my sleeve at the moment, perhaps you could say that I’ve worked through the fear at this point? I guess we shall see.

2017, Year in Review

As the remaining hours of 2017 fade away, I always try to take time to reflect on the accomplishments I had. I don’t typically write them on this platform, but this year, I felt this was the most appropriate place.

This was definitely a long year. It feels so foreign to look at events that transpired in January, and hold them in the same year as events that happened in November. I think this is why it’s such a good idea to reflect.

In the first few months of 2017, I worked with E Leal Productions to finally finish a project that began in 2011. Reborn, a film project that was the launch pad for so many of the people in my network, was finally complete. We held a screening for the cast and crew. It served as a reunion for so many of us who had moved on. It was also a culmination of many years of experience.

Shortly after the Reborn screening, I worked on some employee appreciation videos for Clare Oaks. Through this, we were able to use some of our new equipment. The people involved in this video project were so wonderful and accommodating. It was a great experience.

In the spring, I helped produce Exit Interview for Jason Rugg. It was a submission to the My Rode Reel competition for the year. The shoot day was long and difficult, but as a crew, we were able to finish everything that we had set out to do. The aches and pains were worth it.

Throughout the summer, I worked the Xcelerate summer camps for the 5th year in a row. This was definitely the most difficult year for me for a variety of reasons. The class load that I had this year was the largest it’s ever been, and it covered a variety of topics that really expanded my comfort zone. We’ll see what the upcoming year has in store for me on this front.

While handling all of those summer camps, I finally put together a trailer and poster for my short film, 3:03. I needed to put together these promotional materials in order to start submitting to other festivals. I’m still waiting on word from many of those submissions, but the experience has been a great one so far. The film was actually a semi finalist for Outstanding Female Filmmaker at the Stormy Weather Horror Fest in the summer season!

In October, I produced another short film for Jason Rugg. This film, titled Pin 5:29, was a submission for a Film Riot competition. For this particular entry, the film was condensed to 60 seconds, but a longer, director’s cut is still on the horizon to show off more of the director’s ideas. It was a fun shoot, and I feel like it went really well. It was a great example of expanding experience.

As the final months of 2017 approached, I found myself heading back to the pre-production plan for my upcoming short film, Return to Sender. My pre-production work for this film began at the end of 2016, but was put on hold for a variety of reasons, mostly stemming from my work load at the summer camps and my personal life. I also got engaged, planned a wedding, and got married this year! It was a big year!

It’s nice to be getting back in gear for that project! I know I’ve said this before, but this time I’m hoping to stick to it.. Let’s hit the ground running in 2018!

3:03 at Stormy Weather Horror Fest

It is a pleasure and an honor to announce that my short film 3:03 was selected as a semi finalist for Outstanding Female Filmmaker at Stormy Weather Horror Fest Summer 2017.

It really is an honor to have been nominated as a semi finalist. There were a lot of great horror films in this competition, and to be considered on the same level as the other semi finalists is really just the best feeling. It’s hard to really put it into words. It’s just really nice.

Thank you to the people behind Stormy Weather Horror Fest for watching and appreciating my work. Thanks again to the cast and crew of my short film for sticking by me and helping me out so much. Thank you everyone who has taken the time to view my work and share in the experience.

If you have yet to see my short film, 3:03, you can view it below.

3:03 (2016) Trailer

At long last, a trailer for 3:03 is finally complete!

3:03 Needs a Trailer

Last year, I started work on my latest (as of 2016) short film 3:03. Due to its original purpose, I didn’t really go about promoting it the same way I normally would. Hence, here we are in 2017, and 3:03 still doesn’t have a trailer.

I only recently created a poster for 3:03, and uploaded some stills. Since the film is only 3 minutes, I never even thought about making a trailer for it, until now.

I would like to submit 3:03 to a local film festival. It would be the first film festival I submitted this particular film to (although I had planned on submitting it to my alma mater’s festival that apparently wasn’t held this year). In order to submit the film to this particular festival, it needs a trailer. This causes a bit of a dilemma.

How should I go about making a trailer for such a short film? I don’t want to give away the surprises that make this one stick out. Right now I’m leaning toward a very minimal, maybe abstract approach. Similar to the poster, I will probably lean on the success of my last short film that had a festival run. I’m pretty sure my name doesn’t hold enough weight on its own yet.

In any case, I will need to create a trailer for 3:03 soon enough, so I’ll update again once that has been completed.

3:03 (2016) Online

At last! Now that the My Rode Reel competition is over, I can finally promote my newest short film as a film, rather than a contest entry.

After taking some time to add the new E Leal Productions bumper to the beginning of the film, both 3:03 and the Behind the Scenes video can be seen on Vimeo.

If you want a deeper look into the film’s production, check out the behind the scenes video below!

MyRodeReel 2016 Recap

So the competition for My Rode Reel 2016 is officially over. All of the award winners have been announced, and neither 3:03 or Taco Night received any awards.

We are slightly disappointed, but not entirely surprised. It was a really stiff competition. There were a lot of entries (over 1200), and a lot of those were really well produced. Statistically speaking, our chances were pretty low, but that doesn’t negate the fact that some really great things came from it.

For example, Taco Night ending up ranking 35th out of 1224 for the People’s Choice Award. That’s pretty amazing. Watching it climb through the ranks was pretty great. Jason Rugg did a really good job directing that one, and I’m glad to have helped produce it.

3:03 didn’t fare as well in terms of popularity among viewers, but as I mentioned before, I received some really good feedback on it through YouTube comments. The YouTube comments really stick out to me because the words are from people I don’t know personally. One of the comments was that 3:03 made them feel something even after it was over, and I consider that to be a massive win. That’s all I can ask for.

Plus, it just felt really nice to be back in the swing of things, making short form narratives. Other than my Crash the Super Bowl commercial, this was the first personal narrative project I’d worked on since Lights and ms and me. It was nice to be back in that creative seat again.

MyRodeReel 2016

I realized recently that I’ve been really terrible at attempting to promote my submission to the 2016 MyRodeReel competition. I’m not that great with contests. I’m not expecting to get many votes, so sharing hasn’t been on the top of my list of priorities.

The least I can do is write one blog post about it while it’s still happening.

Submissions closed on June 1, 2016. I uploaded a few days prior to that. At this point, there are over 1200 submissions. The competition is going to be pretty intense. Winners will start to be announced on June 29, 2016, and the final winners will be announced on July 6, 2016.

My submission to the competition was my short film project, 3:03. I’ve blogged about it previously through the entire production process. You can find my submission here, complete with a behind the scenes video.

3:03 is classified as horror and drama. I’m eligible to win as a female filmmaker, and I think we may have some of a shot with the technical sound design category as well. We shall see how that eventually goes. So far, I’ve had viewers say that the film is “really scary” and “unsettling.” I’ll take that as a win.

When the competition is over, I will be making another post with the videos actually embedded for easy viewing. Since voting is a part of the competition, I’ve mainly been sharing the link to the contest page. If you happen to watch the film, and you want to vote, I thank you in advance.

Looking forward to seeing how all of this goes!

3:03 – Post Production

In all honesty, I’ve been waiting to publish this post for quite a while. We filmed 3:03 on April 24th, and we had a rough edit within a couple of hours. There were some shots that we still didn’t have, so they needed to be picked up, and as I hinted in a previous post, we ran into some issues that needed to be resolved. In any case, we had an edit to freak out our actress before she even left the set.

The only reason we were able to have an edit so quickly is because of the planning involved. We knew what shots were needed at what point in the edit. It really just came down to pacing. On top of that, we also had to do a decent amount of color grading to make our footage appear to have been shot at night.

One of the main pick ups that we still needed to film going into the edit was the alarm clock shot. We needed to film 3:03 for 3:03. We probably could have gone about this in an easier way than we did, but I didn’t want to go through the trouble of setting and resetting a clock, so we stayed up to film the time as it actually happened. We almost missed it too! The clock was two minutes faster than my phone, so I almost didn’t hit record on time. That would have been a bit of a pain.

As I mentioned in a previous post, I made some changes to our plans while we were in the middle of the shoot. This caused a bit of a problem. When we filmed an exterior shot, an improv move was thrown in, and I wanted to incorporate that into the final film. In order to include it, I broke the actress’s movements up into two separate takes, and in the edit, this caused a bit of a jump cut. We had to figure out some sort of shot to include within that jump cut to make the edit flow again.

Despite the initial panic over having to figure out something new, I think that what we eventually chose to fill that space actually improves on the story. It’s funny how sometimes mistakes can lead to something better that you never would have thought of originally.

So far, we’ve shown the edit to a few people as a way of testing its effects. It’s been pretty positive! I’m very happy to say! While some of the shots don’t come across as I had originally intended them, I think it works either way. I’ll probably talk more about this when the film is actually released. I’m still trying to avoid spoilers since the overall product is less than three minutes. I will say that I’m definitely getting the creep factor from people that I’ve shown. That’s all I can really ask for at this point.

There will be a finished product and a Behind the Scenes video released soon!